Day 13 - Someone I wish could forgive me

It's been nearly 7 or 8 years since you left us. The whole trauma you put us through. The whole hurt & pain we had to endure. The whole shame & burden we had to carry on our shoulders. The whole fear we had to face. The whole series of event still sticks in my head like plague. Like an irritant I can't get rid of.

Did you even care? Apparently not. Cus you're too busy & too selfish for your own happiness.

The day you walked out of that door, was the day you walked out of my life. For that one split second, you made me believe there was no such thing as Happily Ever After. You tainted the whole idea of love that I had in my mind.

I couldn't care less when people bugged me to look you up. I couldn't be bothered to acknowledge you when we bumped on the streets. Cus I always question myself, "Why should I?"

Yes, call me rude, call me ignorant, call me whatever you want but I'm never convinced why I should give you the respect that you deserve.

Where were you when I was sick? Where were you when I passed my PSLE with flying colours? Where were you when entered secondary school for the first time? Where were you when Kakak got into Uni? Where were you when Rudy broke his arm?

I had no idea where you were. We had no idea where you were.

No amount of convincing will change my heart. They say blood is thicker than water. To hell with that.

So please, forgive me, for not being able to forgive you.

Labels: Day 13 - Someone I wish could forgive me